Holly Madison Feels Her Undiagnosed Autism Led Her To Join Playboy

Former Playboy star Holly Madison revealed she was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, bringing clarity to lifelong social struggles she once attributed to her Alaskan upbringing.

She believes her undiagnosed autism made her vulnerable to Hugh Hefner, with whom she spent seven years on the Playboy Mansion.

Reflecting on their relationship, Holly Madison admitted she “hated” the group encounters but found private moments more normal.

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Holly Madison Reveals Autism Diagnosis, Says It Brings Clarity To Her Past

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Madison says her journey to the Playboy Mansion may need unfolded in a different way had she known she was autistic.

The 45-year-old former Playboy Playmate revealed that she was officially diagnosed with high-functioning autism in 2023, a revelation that, reasonably than shocking her, brought a deep sense of clarity and relief.

In an interview with Page Six, Madison explained that she had “certain social difficulties and difficulties referring to people,” but had all the time attributed them to growing up isolated in a distant a part of Alaska.

It wasn’t until years later, during her marriage to Pasquale Rotella, with whom she shares two children, that the potential of autism got here into focus.

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Rotella reportedly confided in Madison’s mother in regards to the difficulties he faced attempting to emotionally connect together with his wife.

Her mother, in turn, shared that she had all the time suspected there was “something happening” about her daughter’s way of referring to the world.

Following seven clinical evaluations, Madison finally received confirmation that she is on the autism spectrum.

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The Former Playmate Says Undiagnosed Autism Made Her More Vulnerable To Hugh Hefner’s Influence In Her 20s

Hugh Hefner and the 'Girls Next Door'
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Looking back, Madison believes her undiagnosed autism can have made her more vulnerable in her early 20s, and led her to “fall in love” with Playboy founder Hugh Hefner, who was greater than 50 years older than her.

She spent seven years living on the Playboy Mansion alongside several other women, where Hefner was known to expect constant intimacy.

Reflecting on that chapter of her life, she explained, “I feel like having the problem I did connecting with people for therefore long made me feel like once I was meeting anyone who was older and more experienced and perhaps a bit of bit higher at manipulating people, I assumed, ‘Oh, wow, perhaps I’m meant to be with an older man. Possibly that is what it’s.’ It just felt like love.”

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Her diagnosis, she added, helps her higher understand her mindset and motivations during that point.

“It definitely sheds some light on where my feelings were at and my motivations and why I had certain impressions about things,” Madison noted.

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Holly Madison To Make First Major Public Appearance Since Autism Diagnosis

Holly Madison attends the 'TAO, Beauty & Essex, Avenue and Luchini' opening event in Hollywood
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Though she insists she doesn’t regret her experiences, Madison admits that knowing about her autism earlier may need modified how she handled certain situations.

Today, as co-host of the “Girls Next Level” podcast, she views her diagnosis as an “interesting” and necessary a part of her personal story.

Later this month, “The Girls Next Door” alum will make her first major public appearance since sharing her diagnosis, serving because the event ambassador for the 2025 Grant a Gift Gala in Las Vegas.

The annual fundraiser supports children and young adults living with autism and other neurodevelopmental disorders by providing access to vital resources and care.

Despite her fame, Madison describes herself as a naturally introverted and personal person. Still, after learning about her diagnosis, she felt a powerful sense of responsibility to make use of her platform to talk out and help break down stereotypes, fight stigma, and advocate for higher services for those on the spectrum.

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The Former Playmate Says She ‘Hated’ Group Sex At The Playboy Mansion: ‘It Was Disgusting’

Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner, Bridget Marquardt, and Kendra Wilkin.
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Earlier in May, Holly Madison revisited her relationship with Playboy founder Hefner, candidly admitting that she “hated” the group sexual encounters that always took place on the Playboy Mansion.

Speaking on the “In Your Dreams” podcast with host Owen Thiele, the 45-year-old offered an unfiltered take a look at what really went on behind closed doors during her years as certainly one of Hefner’s girlfriends.

“It’s a really different story between after we were just by ourselves than with everybody else within the room,” she explained. “Everybody else within the room, no. That was disgusting. I hated it. I made it very known I hated it.”

Despite their 53-year age difference, Madison said intimacy between her and Hefner felt surprisingly “normal” when it was private.

“If it was just me and him, it was rather a lot more normal than you’ll think,” she explained.

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Holly Madison Accused Hugh Hefner Of Using A Bizarre Method To ‘Control’ The Playboy Girls

Bridget Marquardt, Hugh Hefner and Holly Madison.
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In 2023, Madison made some daring claims in regards to the late Hefner, linked to his alleged dislike of red lipstick.

During an appearance on the “Ahead of the Curve” podcast, she discussed his aversion to the particular color of lipstick being worn by the Playboy models, claiming that it was Hefner’s “control tactic,” and that she did not have a difficulty with it when she first entered the mansion.

“I believe it was a control tactic, but in addition, once I was brand recent, I wore red lipstick out a few times, and he didn’t say anything about it,” Madison recalled, adding, “because whenever you were the brand new girl within the group, you were all the time treated well.”

Madison then brought up a phrase she heard about being in a cult, stating, “Any person said, like, the upper up you might be in a cult, the more severe you are treated because they need the brand new people to bond and feel into it.”

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